hi miss!

i met my old lecturer yesterday while looking for a book.

for some reason i blushed. because she was the strict type. the reasonably strict type.

'so what are you up to?'

she asked.

i felt a kind of dread.

i'm not THERE yet.

but she reminds me of me- 3 years ago.

i dont have that terribly exciting i'd rather work than sleep feeling yet.

i dont really dress that well-still.

and i stutter when im nervous-still.

but im much calmer and settled somehow.

and positive as usual.

but of course i couldnt blurt all this out.

we exchanged polite greetings instead.

and went our separate ways.

glad that at least we'd cross path again.

if only for a minute.

hi miss!

saving

an interesting advice from dr. faridah as i was commenting on her post

well more like Dr. Faridah's late father, may Allah bless him

He started saving up for his daughter's hajj account since she was SIX.

Wah. and Dr. F said she bought her first car with part of that money!

what an awesome practice that i wish i have emulated sooner.

in fact i was planning to start saving up for my wedding end of this year- masa ni belum jumpa calon. and i learnt my lesson well not to hasten a good act.

so my advice to single people is start saving anyway. no you dont need that 200 ringgit shoe. no you do not need to spoil yourself rotten.

just because you have boobs your future guy will not be able to grant all your wishes.

soon that money you stashed will be much needed.

maybe to follow your dreams.

maybe as a down payment.

or for travel.

or a sewing machine (sigh)

and pay off mum's debt. (double sigh)

life!

:D

oprah

current interest is reading articles from oprah.com.

simply to keep me sane during writing-up process.

writing a book is harder than expected. writing a children's book is much harder.

i wish uia had a children literature course. hope they'll be one in the future. so far a promising writing for children course i saw is in the US.

i'd love to travel again but gotta marry 'the boyfriend' first.

nangis

quite a lot of people asked whether i am nervous or scared.

my work is taking a huge part of my life this moment and at times i cannot think of anything else. there are so many things i want to complete within this 3 weeks. im quite grateful jugak, at least it helps me not to become nervous! hehe.

also those few things that i have to take care off, like buying gifts for hantaran, and maybe finding a shoe, and other small details occupy my free time. yes!

but one of the nights last week i find myself awake in the middle of the night. crying. soon i'll be leaving the safe cocoon my parents have built for me to move to another one with different roles that comes with it.

i guess thats why babies cry once they enter the world, that split, physically and emotionally must have shook them to brave up the new world they are entering- cry of courage.i hope!

i think my tears were more melancholic, simple reflecting how far i have come, and wondering about whats coming. i see my parents and i just want to scream that i love them with all my heart no matter what. its scary to stop depending on them. at the same time exhilarating.

i remember going up the cable car, i was so scared that something would happen. but once i see the whole view everything was worth it. i see the bigger picture.

im still a bit wobbly from the quick turn of events unfolding one by one, but its all good.you just got to give up good to get great!

sms dari iman

pagi ini

'Selamat Pengantin Baru. Tak dapat hadir sebab demam.'

dan saya balas

'sah demam. saya kawin bulan depan.'

reading course

has gone ok last saturday- i felt my 2 hour slot were quite dull. the next one will be on the 26th of desember; and i really want to revamp the course syllable inshaAllah.

its quite a relief to have it over so i can concentrate on doing things for my wedding.

on saturday nite me and three shopaholic friends scrounged the jalan TAR. they have long recommended the place for beautiful wedding veil. they were beautiful, but just not me. i like simple and pretty stuff. they were heavy and pretty.

i am not going to wear heels because i am a 5'6 ish bride (and not a midget as imran would say)

i think the rest of the things is pretty much settled by my lovely parents. they said they have booked the catering. i did not ask for the menu pulak but inshaAllah they'll be good.

i will use pakcik's bekas hantaran since he just got married. and mum said her friend is lending us a brand new dulang set. wah people can be so generous.

imran's mum has booked kuih bahulu to give to guests.

everything is pretty much low-key alhamdulillah. ive always wanted a simple wedding. in fact i think i once berangan to have a wedding by the sea so i can wear casual clothes; and then we could jump straight into the sea. haha. talking about sea imran said he wants to bring me to perhentian after the wed but my friend pointed out that its the monsoon season and i might get blown by the wind masa naik bot nanti. cis! guess we'll have to see whats the weather's like next month.

sometimes i do feel nervous (the feeling is like im going to puke) my life is going steer into another big turn and i do not see whats around the corner. but whenever i see imran smile or laugh i know that things will turn out fine.

fugly

you can have the most perfect skin

the prettiest face

the loveliest clothes

but if you don't mend those heart

to be beautiful

to me you're just freaking ugly

knowledge..

yasir qadhi in his lecture 'why we worship Allah' said nothing bring about religious spirituality like knowledge.

my recommendation for Islamic books and lectures (english):

you can try these places:

www.abuhudzaifahhoney.blogspot.com
www.dakwahbookstore.com.my
www.ibtbooks.com

i know you are an editor, but what is it that you do?

1. well i edit children's books like the one above. had you seen the unedited version you would have been shocked at how different it is. the reason is there are 5 editors in our company-we all have one aim of producing great books but our way to get there are different.

2. sometimes my boss have an urgent letter or proposal to make, he might call me up to do the typing too.

3. sometimes i make tea for visitors.

4. i also talk to writers wanna be about the procedures.

5. i try hard to convince my boss why a particular manuscript should not have seen the daylight in the first place.

6. i coordinate with graphics and illustrators. i chase them up, i drive them crazy by doing proofreading for about 50 times before im satisfied and i might buy them food to make it up to them. and then..i do it again.

7. my colleagues might ask me the spelling of a particular word. i go to google and give them the answer. they think im a genius. i think google is genius. its a good deal.

8. sometimes i kill cockroaches in the kitchen.

9. if im not in the mood to work i talk to my colleagues, sms my fiance, email, open facebook, open my blog and make coffee. guilty as charged.

10. my desk is very messy. i dont clean them up until my boss gives me the i cant believe you are this disgusting look.

11. i look out the window if i turn blue from reading too much.sometimes i feel like i work in a cave. with air condition.

12. the marketing people or my boss or other editor will also chase me about my deadline, or about the progress of my book.

13. yes, i have to write books too. sometimes rhymes- and some published! i am proud of this fact even though i only write silly rhymes about frogs, dolls, naughty kids, good kids, monsters and the like.when the rhymes don't work i get frustated, i sulk, write it again, throw it in the bin, go home and buy a ridiculously expensive food. the next day i try again.

14. i sleep sometimes. sorry boss.

15. i talk to international publishers who coolaborate with us. most of the time my boss will tell me what to say. sometimes i am is his personal secretary.

16. we also have a schedule for answering the phone, going to the bank, buying stationery, and counting books at the store.

17. sometimes i forget where i put things, so i frantically look for them.

18. i do filing work, i put contract in the right cabinet, i buy books, i get free books, and i make sure the shoes in front are organized nicely.

19. i try to make sure my socks have no holes in them since we dont wear shoes here.

20. now we have a pep talk every morning at 9.00. if i dont find it interesting i doodle things in my diary.

21. my boss who's a big reader sometimes ask whether i have read a particular book or watch a movie he deems interesting. when i say no he'll look at me like you unbelievably dull girl! of course when i ask him the same thing and he says no i have to look at him like its ok, you dont have time to read such dull book anyway. of course i always feel like saying 'ahah! gotcha!'.

you know...its a whole load of things mixed into one.

sometimes my days are a just a big blur.

sometimes its awesome.

its my job.

tak selalu ribut

kali terakhir saya jumpa Diana, saya berikan dia buku Faisal Tehrani yg di-sign.

Diana gadis cantik, yg terleka sekejap dgn dunia dan mencuba dadah. rupanya dadah itu terlalu kuat hingga menjadikan sarafnya rosak. Diana menghidap cerebral palsy dan duduk di rumah kebajikan. Jika saya bertanya pasal keluarga, air matanya akan mengalir.Dengarnya keluarganya mewah, mungkin malu untuk menerima hakikat mengenai anak mereka yang cacat sekarang.

Dah lama saya tak jenguk Diana. Harap dia masih tabah. Saya rindu kata-kata semangat darinya. Rindu pegangan tangannya bila dia bagi nasihat. Tuturnya mungkin tidak jelas, tapi dia gadis kuat yang saya kagumi.

office

extra cheerful today, potluck raya.

I've been at Al-Ameen for 1 year and 6 months, a place where I grow up.

its 1st of october!

my friend pointed out i'll be married in 1 month 12 days.

phwoar! now that she said it...

debaran!

i just picked up my wed invitation card yesterday and handed them out to my colleagues.

Iman generously designed our card and this doa card i want to frame in the bridal room.

I'm very touched with people around us who kindly volunteered their skills without asking for anything in return. Alhamdulillah.

may Allah make it easy.

copyright- Iman Abdul Manaf.