snap

how i imagined me as a wife is definitely far from what i am now.

i imagined.me to be.

this cheery energetic wife, who cleans the house happily. and throwing things in the kuali and out come delicious dishes. i imagined a smiley persona, soft hearted, gentle and loving.

what i am.

SINGA.

oh my god. i do not where my short temperedness comes from. i think i was more of a cool headed person before.

little things snap me off. is that dirty laundry out of the basket? i snap. he's late. i snap. is that RUBBISH? i snap.

and all the while he calmly face my moods, temper, and a thousand more things with a smile.

marriage is not easy. the early months is not easy too. here's a roommate with rights over you, in which requires your patience and obedience.

when you are dog tired you still have keep going.

i have cried in his arms simply because i got tired.

i have cried simply because i got scared that i'm not doing good enough.

at these times it is not much fun.

when we fight it is not much fun.

when we got told of our weaknesses its not easy to take it in.

but there is comfort.

in knowing we are growing together.

there is comfort.

when he asks when i'm coming home.

when he says i love you.

or when doesn't say anything at all.

and there is comfort.

knowing this is the person God intends for me. and therefore he must be good for me.